What should I do when my child always wants to win in play?

 

About our hosts:

A creative entrepreneur who focuses on ways to tackle the root of children's mental health through play and secure relationships. Due to her own challenging experiences in childhood, Sophia went on to establish a thriving Play & Creative Arts Therapy charity to support other children who have experienced trauma. Her focus is on helping therapists, businesses and charities have more of an impact for children and families that they work with through coaching, strategy, fundraising and mentoring.

Nicole is a mum to two young boys, who also has over 20 years of brand marketing experience. She is a previous Chair Trustee at Clear Sky Charity and has past experience on the Ella’s Kitchen board.  Her roles have included Marketing Director, Head of Ella’s-ness, Global Brand Director with responsibility of creating and building one brand inside and out – including the wellbeing and culture of the team.  Nicole was instrumental in growing Ella’s into a multi-million pound international business, driven by the mission of creating healthy children.

Our vision is to drive connected, happy parent-child relationships, for the benefit of the whole family. Our mission and passion is to educate parents in how to become happy, mindful and confident in connecting with their own children through play.

 

Treasure Time website https://www.treasuretime.co.uk/ 

Treasure Time digital course for parents - https://www.treasuretimeapp.co.uk/shop-page

 

-  I could actually stand back and let them decide what the rules were - they would change constantly! - and I would be able to watch their little frustrations kind of fizzle away as they practiced this themselves - Nicole

- So what happens is when children feel like they don't win enough, they'll change the rules so that they can win – Sophia

- We have been resisting flexing the rules as we don't want to let them win all the time, not realizing that in play this isn't the time for the lesson, “you can't win them all!”  - Nicole

- Sometimes I think that we worry or there's a fear that if we always let them win, or if we go soft on them, that there'll be a sore loser. But the opposite is often true. Children who never have the chance to experience feeling of winning may never feel good or capable within games - Sophia

- Boundaries sound like very short statements that are not there to be argued with. So here are some examples. Shoes are for the floor, not the sofa. Food is for eating, not for throwing, water is for the bath, not for the floor – Sophia

- Without limits, there is no safety. So children actually really need limits and boundaries to feel safe. And sometimes we might feel mean putting boundaries in place, but children really need them, and they thrive under them. And when they don't have clear boundaries, they can feel a bit wobbly and a bit unsafe - Sophia

 

 

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