327: Mom Guilt Is A Lie

This is going to sound pretty controversial, but I’m saying it anyway.  Because of #truth...

Mom guilt is a lie.

That’s not to say your feelings of guilt aren’t real.  THEY ARE.

But, as you sit in those feelings, please know this:

Mom guilt is a social construct in which women are indoctrinated to think they should feel bad for ever prioritizing themselves, their identity, their careers, or their happiness over their kids.

You know how I know this is true??  Because I know the following:

Men are not asked, “How do you do it all?  How do you juggle your career with your family?

Men are not asked, “Don’t you feel bad when you have to travel for work and you don’t get to see your kids for 3 days?”

Men don’t have to internalize messages like, “I don’t know how you work so much.  I would feel so bad not being at my kid’s games/practices/plays/recitals.”

When men consider taking up new hobbies/activities they don’t automatically think, “That would be awesome, but I would feel so bad taking that time away from my family.”

Women are indoctrinated to feel like shitty moms if they prioritize their careers, their self-care, their sanity over their families needs. 

Men are encouraged to prioritize their careers and hobbies over their families needs - “Climb that corporate ladder!”  “You gotta start golfing with us, man!”  “Meet us every Saturday for pick up basketball!”

I share this all because I want you to take a hard look at your relationship with mom guilt.  Guilt of any kind is not productive.  It keeps us stuck.  It holds us back.  It does not serve any positive purpose.  So, it you’re spending time stuck in mom guilt, you’re wasting time and energy that could be used for so many other positive things in your life. 

Let’s flip this social construct on its head so we can all be more intentional about how we use our energy, our gifts, and our rights to rest (yes, you get to rest more when you stop feeling so damn guilty!)

Listen in to this episode to go on a deep dive into how you’ve been indoctrinated - and how to GET OUT. 

Links mentioned:

• Book: Drop The Ball by Tiffany Dufu

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