Episode 258: Get Past Your Past with Jason VanRuler

My guest, Jason VanRuler, shares his direct and honest approach to working with couples and offers a fresh perspective on overcoming past challenges and building exceptional relationships. During our conversation, you’ll discover how to “Get Past Your Past” as Jason shares invaluable insights, emphasizing the importance of taking action and not seeking validation from others for your progress. We also discuss navigating resistance in relationships, dealing with differing narratives in divorce, and addressing the complexities of sex addiction within marriage. With over a decade of experience as a coach and therapist, Jason’s expertise shines through as he offers practical advice and compassionate support.  Featured topics: Jason explains what he means by “get past your past…” (2:28) “Sometimes it’s not that you don’t know what to do; it’s that you are not doing what you’re supposed to do.” (8:53) It is essential to recognize that not everyone will be happy about your progress when you do the work. Do not determine your success by the approval of the people you are surrounded by. (9:56) The effects and challenges a couple faces when one is doing the work and the other is resistant. (13:07) Jason answers, “What do you do when your ex-partner has a narrative about your divorce that differs from yours?” (22:52) The effects of sex addiction on marriage and how Jason works with couples around this type of addiction. (31:57) Learn more about Jason VanRuler: Jason VanRuler has worked in everything from the corporate world to the entrepreneurial one — and has over a decade of experience as a coach and therapist dedicated to helping others. With extensive experience as a coach, clinician, and speaker, Jason now owns a private practice, writes books, gives speeches, and facilitates and leads groups across the world. Coaching is always equal parts affirming, honest, and compassionate — and Jason’s practice has led with this approach when helping every client seeking guidance and direction. Whether it’s leadership coaching, relationship building, couples therapy, addiction, trauma, or something different, his goal is the same: to speak truth and grace into every life I work with. When Jason is not facilitating, coaching, speaking, or writing, you can find him cycling, fly fishing, and living life with his wife and three children at their home in South Dakota.   Resources & Links: Kate’s book “The D Word Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Jason’s website Jason’s book Get Past Your Past Jason on Instagram TODAY’S EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY: PRIMIS BANK Get started navigating your new financial picture with Primis Bank. For terms and conditions, visit primisbank.com/dsg. SOBERLINK Surviving divorce is one thing, but surviving divorce with a co-parent who abuses alcohol is a whole different ball game. Soberlink is a high-tech breathalyzer system that sends you instant results of a co-parent’s alcohol levels. When your co-parent tests, their identity is automatically confirmed with facial recognition, and tamper sensors ensure no cheating has occurred. You then get instant proof that your kids are safe in their care. Court admissibility in all 50 states Facial recognition Tamper detection Easy-to-read Advanced Reporting™ Help your family thrive in the new year. Visit www.soberlink.com/dsg to learn more and get $50 off your device. DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.